Monday, June 25, 2007

Standing Outside the Fire

The great thing about coming back home to Long Island is the off-chance, the random occasion, that you see somebody out whom you haven't seen in ages, and whom you are actually happy to encounter. This happened to me tonight at Applebees with an old friend of mine, Dennis Regan.

Dennis and I were in Scouts together, so we saw each other every Tuesday for 6 or 7 years (if not more), in addition to all the camping trips and other weekly events that we Scouts used to partake in.

One time, on a trip to Washington DC, Dennis and I formed a band with a couple of other of the guys; we called ourselves the Hot Scouts of America. We even wrote a creed, in the form of a Batman & Joker-sort, out of cheese-in-a-can written on Ritz Crackers, which proclaimed that we were the Hot Scouts and any intruders shan't mess with us. Man, we were cool.

Dennis and I really haven't stayed in touch since he delivered the convocation at my Eagle ceremony in 2004. I was really glad to have one of my best friends in the group induct me into this selective group that we had all striven to be a part of ever since we joined, as Cub Scouts, back before we had any sense of what Scouting was or what it would mean to us.

Scouting taught me how to be part of a community; it taught me how to give back to others and how to let myself have fun at the same time; it taught me values and morals--personal integrity--that I carry with me from day-to-day, wherever I go; it taught me how to appreciate others and all that other people do for me.

I hope Dennis looks back on his Scouting experience as fondly as I do. It's something I don't talk about too often, but something I'm damn proud of. It has made me who I am today, without a doubt. And it's funny, in the ironic/"this must be a sign or a symbol for something" kind of way that earlier today I finally--after three years have passed--hung up all of my Eagle Scout plaques in my room, as a constant reminder of the values and good memories in my life that I should cherish and keep with me always.

As I finish typing this rather reminiscent blog, it is only fitting that the shuffle on my iTunes brings up the one song that will always remind me of Scouting: "Standing Outside the Fire" by Garth Brooks. Now, I'm not really one for country, but the Baiting Hollow Scout Camp would always play this song at their end-of-the-week campfire, where they showed clips from the week to all the campers, who got the opportunity to hoot and holler at the counselors who became friends that week, or their fellow Scouts who were caught in the act of goofing off.

But I can use Garth Brook's song as a metaphor to my own life: a reminder to constantly stand outside the fire, and look at both my own reflection in the flames and the images of those people who are surrounding me, joining me in my campfire in my camp, where I am the counselor, constantly stealing glances to my clipboard, planning activities, and living my life one day, one week, one summer at time, with the help and support of those who currently surround me (my campers) and those who are there to surround me and support me for the long run (my counselors-in-training). Everyone I meet has their choice of camper or CIT; they have to learn stand outside the fire themselves and make their own choice.

Sometimes, you just need to run into someone from the past like Dennis Regan to remind you to take a step back and see where you've been and where you're going.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey! I have to say, your blog entries are amazing! And I'm not just saying that...your descriptions and manner in which you weave each entry is palpable. I'm able to see the world through your eyes and feel what you are feeling even if I didn't know anything about you or any of your stories.

I haven't written anything lately. I'm going to start carrying around my little notebook again though. I have these moments where the world stops and I see everything so clearly, and I want to write it down and remember that one snapshot in time forever.

This happened to me a few days ago. I was at Pastorius Park, this park where different bands come and play for free every Wednesday night. Last Wednesday was a zydeco band...yes...zydeco...originated in Louisianna I believe. Very interesting and distinct sounds. People dance to the music, similar to swing dancing. Anyway, I was just watching people dance. And I had one of those moments...the world stops, and I see. Maybe it's because I've been a dancer for so long and so it touched my soul (as cliche as that sounds). But it did. I saw people dancing, enjoying, smiling, and laughing, and I realized it didn't matter who you were or what your purpose was, dance brings people together. It is an expression of feeling and keeping you right in the moment, enjoying every step. And then I realized, dancing is like life...sometimes you might skip a beat or stumble but the music keeps playing and your feet keep moving. Or sometimes things just flow right on the beat and you don't have to think, you just do, and it's just right.

And so, dancing and movement are a window to the soul. Are you going to let your stumbles prevent you from enjoying and keeping your feet moving, or are you going to laugh at your mistakes and find your own rhythm again?

:) Ilyse